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Roopali Sircar Gaur, Ph.D.

Mystery of a Lost Name

I lost her name somewhere

from where I can’t get there.

Her name I have lost

but not memories of her.


Can you tell me her name?

I met her in a rusty dusty bus on the

highway from somewhere to nowhere.

We had sat silent and sulky quite unknowingly

and then at a roadside cafe we spoke.

Later as evening fell she told me a story...

She told me her teen twins died

on their birthday in a car crash

all she had hugged was a handful of ash.

A long grief filled year passed before

she let her mate know

she was afraid he too would die

all alone in a foreign land.

Do you think that's why I lost her name

never ever to find it again?


I remember her story but can’t remember her name

Each winter I hug the maroon velvet abaya

she brought for me from faraway Libya.

You see she remembered my name

and had found me.

Somewhere else away from

bleeding memories she felt free

she said she was happy there

she helped women give birth in her care

sometimes when they were twins

she blessed them from her heart.


If you remember her name

tell me even if the night is dark and

the moon has hidden its face.

Some nights sleep eludes me

“You “she had said holding

my hand to her heart

“are my only friend.”


I don’t remember her name .

Only that dusty rusty mysterious bus which

goes from somewhere to nowhere.

Did she make me forget her name?





Bio


Dr. Roopali Sircar Gaur, PhD. bilingual poet-performer, writer, environmentalist, and social justice activist. Roopali taught English at Delhi University in India. She has written for peer-reviewed journals, and served on academic conference panels worldwide. Roopali’s poems have been translated into Hindi, Bangla and Telugu, Her poems are housed at Stanford University’s Digital Humanities initiative, Life in Quarantine: Witnessing Global Pandemic, and in the University of Bath’s Transnational project. She is the Consulting Editor for Different Truths, an online global participatory journal, and the Poetry Editor for the Aspiring Writers’ Society.



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