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Alpana Issar

I named him Shiva


He was always missing

from my class

even though he sat

looking attentive

Until he fell asleep .

Shivendra kumar

I named him Shiva

All of five years

And such a package of delight.

His cherubic mouth, rosy cheeks and

Sparkling brown eyes

In front.

I was sure

He was the apple of his parents eyes

Till I learnt the ugly truth.


Why do people bear children

If it's not their intentions

To care for them well?

This is a question

I have asked me

And the world at large

From time to time.

On asking my mother,

I got a sweet response .

She said,

They make life a worthy cause.

They bring sweetness

and camaraderie together.

They make us aware

what true innocence is

Until

We start to corrupt them.


Getting back to Shivindra

He was named after Lord Shiva .

His mother did adore him

Even when she hadn't bore him

From her womb.

She worked hard

To give him a good life.

A nurse by profession, her days were full.

She couldn’t conceive

So the next best choice

Was to adopt .

She married because of that reason.


Shiva was a package deal.

He was naughty as hell

Stole tiffins , ate them.

He beat up the classmates

With his belt.

And teased the girls.



This was when

I was absent

And a substitute was in charge .

I could not believe it

When told all of this.

My little angel was a devil incarnate.


One of the rainy days

I learnt a truth .

Streaks of blood had appeared

At the back of his shirt.

You know how it is

Moist cloth does tend to absorb the littlest colour.

When I patted his back

To appreciate his classwork

He winced. Shivered.

Taking him outside later

I discovered

Welts of undried canning .

He had been beaten bad.

That day I took him

Under my wing .

He was with me the whole time.

At break time

I saw he carried a snack box

Which was empty

barring the residual pieces of stale bread

From days before.


On asking Who hurt him

He kept quiet and turned his back to me.

Late milestones

(He had been a problem baby.)

In any case he spoke little.

In our classroom

Cause he stammered.

He had just begun

To build a vocabulary.


We called his mother

She was very apologetic

She was aware

Of these beatings.

He was naughty at home .

Broke things . Destructive .

Latest being the New Television.

His unemployed father thrived on.


When we asked for about the father

She went quiet. Head bent low,

She said, She did not know

How to contact him.

Being jobless

He was searching for work.

He was also irritable

As he couldn't provide .

He was a drunkard

And demanded a pocket money

To care for the boy.


Shiva's beatings increased

He knew now though

That to hide away his woes

He needed to keep away .

Sometimes he went missing the whole day.

He hid in the school premises.

Old sheds, the shrubbery and toilets.

Announcements were made

And search parties set .


I found him marked absent

Sometimes in a few classes.

(The teachers whom he disliked

For they used the rod.)

A small boy with secrets galore.

His mother was a gentle soul

And very good at Her work.

She worked hard to provide

A good life .


It was one of those days

When I decided to personally check out

What exactly ailed this family .

(Thoughts about him troubled me at night.)

I was his teacher

And this much I believe I was entitled.

Noting down his address

I made my visit.

It was a Saturday.

School was off.


Nobody attended the call bell

It wasn't possible

A kid to be left unattended.

One as naughty as him.

I went around the house.

Peeped into the windows

Till I saw the unthinkable .

He sat on a chair

Tied up with a cord.

He was asleep

With his head hanging down

on his shoulder.

I knocked on the window

It didn’t waken him.

The sound ,though, did make someone alert.


I sought permission

and brought in the authorities.

When I returned

And rang the bell once again,

Calling loud the boy’s name.

Out came the father

Looking annoyed at first.

Then began the denials

and the mother was called.


See , this is where she broke down.

Revealed that he was a brute .

She pleaded on his behalf

Cause he is the father.

But I wanted to meet Shiva first

And speak with him.

On entering his room

saw him laid up on bed.

His wrists were red.

He did not move a bit.

But His eyes tightly shut and

His fists closed tight,

That gave it way .

I picked him up

And he shouted in pain.

On asking the how and why

He did not have a reply

Just wept a lot.


The father was informed to report

To the police station

For child abuse .

( boy later revealed

The man beat his mother too.

black and blue.)

On being told there would be action taken.

He said he was a lawyer

He knew his rights

He knew his rights for all the wrongs he did.

Systems don’t work efficiently

For what they have been placed.

Child help line calls went unanswered

So the police was called,

that did the trick .

Sending off that ugly prick

Away from the family .

Away from physical and mental harm.


Months later, the mother confided.

The man always called the little boy ‘bastard’.

Even though the name was chosen by him.

‘ A blessing from the Gods’ he’d said.

' Shiva’s biological mother had been

a prostitute’.

She died during the delivery.

She was her own sister.

The one who funded her nurse training.

The husband found out this secret

One day whilst searching through her documents

and then began the torture.








Alpana Issar

I do believe we can get through this thing called life smoothly if we reach out to each other earnestly . There is enough for all if we share. An artist by profession and have been a teacher by vocation. Life has been beautiful with all the challenges thrown at us . We just grow stronger.

Teacher, Painter, Photographer and an outreach activist. Presently living in Vishakapatnam on the eastern coast of India. I am grateful for the way of life which has given me many fine opportunities to hone and develop my skills as a person with many interests. I have also been very fortunate to travel through India and abroad, learn about different cultures and learn a foreign language while living in Chile Published poetry in two Anthologies by Roopali Gaur Sircar &Anita Nahal.

Diverse voices -In all the spaces And Earth fire water wind .

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